The Unspoken Truth
We met. For a moment, it felt like I was with someone who would not be just a friend. She would be my life partner. So, what should I tell her that describes me? What should I ask her that makes me understand her?
I decided to get her flowers. I thought maybe that could be a good starting point for the conversation. What type of flowers do you like? What’s your favorite color? Those are reasonable questions, right? As I didn’t know much about her then, I chose an arrangement of lilies and carnations — red, white, and yellow.
When I met her, she was delighted by the flowers. Her smile captured the moment, and I felt like this is a date I would like to be in. We picked a spot at the restaurant, and I let her take the call on that. The shy me had not been to that place, and the social her had tried almost every place in the city. So, it felt like the logical thing to do.
If you’re unaware about how arranged marriages go, let me tell you that there is a lot of hype built around the first meeting. Some people (not me) even draft a series of questions that they would ask. So, as we sat, she waited for me to take the lead. I don’t remember how it went from there, but we placed the order first. She liked a particular preparation of pasta that the restaurant served, and we went with it.
My next move? I asked her how her day was (somehow that’s the first statement everyone asks these days). She said it was okay. And as she went on sharing details about her day, and I was observing her smile and reactions. It felt like she was honest and genuine in her responses, and it made me comfortable that she is willing to share. So, I started opening up.
We spent 2 hours having a fun interaction — a lot of smiles, jokes, personal talks, and others. And once we were done with the meal, I dropped her to her car. I didn’t know whether it’s right to take a picture on the first date, so, I avoided that. I also didn’t know whether it would be right to offer a hug, so, I avoided that as well. Hence, we shook hands and she left.
Shook hands? Are you kidding me, Akshansh! This was not a business meeting! Why would you shake hands?
Turns out, your mind runs on overdrive once the moment is over. You start assessing your every move. I did the same. The one primary question running in my mind was, is she the one? Was I attracted to her? Did I enjoy our time together enough to call her back? These are pretty hard questions to answer if it’s your first time going on a date with someone.
After I gathered my thoughts, I called up my friends and shared what I felt. As I reached home, I left her a message that it was great meeting her today.
Now came the important question — what happens next? Where does this go from here? Let’s say if she decides that she didn’t like me, how would she communicate? Would we just stop talking?
I didn’t receive a response to my text until later that evening. I thought she must be occupied. When I did receive her text, I sent another general text (how was your day!). She didn’t respond.
Her silence was the unspoken truth. We didn’t talk, but we knew why we weren’t talking.
I don’t know what is the way to close it. And, a no-response from her was assuring but not confirming. So, I did something.
That’s a post for another time. Until then, I wish everyone looking for a partner — good luck!
If time flies when you are with them, hold on to them. If you cannot take your eyes off them, don’t. If their smile rejoices you, keep smiling. The world is different with companionship.
Hey world, I have started dreaming!